Greatest Gift - Journal Your Christmas 2012

I received so many well thought out gifts over the years, but the ones that mean the most to me are the ones thought up by my precious Bug.  Last year was easily my favorite.  I have an obsession with "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer," more specifically the Bumble.  I love him...I love that he is the villain of an amazing holiday tale...I love that a crazy peppermint miner discovers the issue with the monster...I love that the elf who really wants to be a dentist heals him...I love that by the end of the story the Bumble is a meek...lovable giant.

Any time I see a Bumble I giggle like a child.  It transports me to a time when my life was much more simple.  A time when I could simply watch a program and get lost in the spirit of the season.  Last year I was renting a video at Blockbuster and I saw a display of Bobble-heads.  To my delight they were Rudolph themed Bobbles.  They had Rudolph, Hermey, Yukon Cornelius...and the Bumble.  I was positively giddy.  The bug was with me and watched my very childish display.  I had every plan of returning to buy that bobbley head for myself, but at the time I was having chemo every week and spent more time than not feeling very crummy.  I never made it back to that store and it put a small damper on my holiday spirit.  

We have a tradition of opening one gift on Christmas Eve.  This Christmas Eve the Bug chose my gift for me.  I usually let her choose.  It was a small box, but she always gets it right so i was very excited.  I had only torn a corner of the paper and I knew she had nailed my gift yet again.  I started ripping the paper, and revealed my very own Bumble Bobble.  I mean just try saying that without smiling.  The Christmas season came to a close, but I could not bear to put my Bumble away.  I didn't put him in a box with all our other decorations.  I chose to place him on a special shelf in my kitchen.  I know he is a  "holiday" decoration, but having him out where I can see him all the time makes me happy.  I do not look at him every day...I may go weeks and not notice his bobbley head looking down at me...but when I do see him...I am reminded of the child who loves me so unconditionally.  The child who watched her mother geek out over a bobble head and went back with her own money to make a Christmas dream come true.  

Rudolph is on tonight...I will watch with the Bug...maybe take down my Bumble...I will enjoy one of my holiday traditions with my precious child!!!!

To the Moon and Back,

Sarah

Countdown to Christmas - Journal Your Christmas 2012

I remember waiting not so patiently for our Christmas decorations to be brought out of the attic.  The big black metal trunk and various other cardboard boxes.  The unearthing of our decorations usually lined up with the unveiling of Christmas decor around town...that meant the day after Thanksgiving.  We lived in a relatively small town and only really had a mall, a Target and a Wal-Mart  for our shopping needs.  So once Black Friday passed we could count on the foil trees hanging on street lights...Santa arriving in the Mall and Christmas themed decorations on display for purchase.  
My favorite way to countdown my time until Christmas meant I had to wait until December actually started.  We had an Advent Calendar we used every year and I remember it with great detail and fondness.  It was simple...made of felt...and it looked like a calendar.  The top half was a Christmas Tree and the bottom half was a calendar numbered 1-25.  The pieces we used to mark off the days were made of plastic and in various holiday shapes (toy soldier, holly leaves, ornaments, etc).  As each day passed my brother and I would take turns moving an "ornament" off the tree and onto the calendar.  Each cheerful piece of plastic got us one day closer to the big day.  I would be lying if I said we didn't have our favorites.  The candy cane and toy soldier would go first...the sleigh and ornament shapes would be some of the final pieces to make it down to the calendar.  The same pieces were always the final three.  Rudolph, Mrs. Claus and the big man...waited for their days much more patiently than we did.  On Christmas Eve we would move the "red nosed reindeer" and then head off to bed.  We would strain to hear the hooves on the roof...look out our windows to see the glow of the reindeer's nose...listen for the tell tale laugh of the jolly old man.  The time leading up to Christmas was so magical.  It was a time to believe in miracles and granting of wishes.  As our readiness to believe started to fade, our advent calendar started to show its age.  The velcro on the back of the ornaments might not stick quite as well as it had in our youth, but we still loved moving the ornaments from tree to calendar well into our teens.  I don't know what happened to that calendar...but I hope it is still in my parents' attic.  It is a treasured memory...and my favorite way to countdown our days before the big day!

to the moon and back my lovelies!
Sarah

This is NOT our calendar but it is close.
You know of the close but not cigar variety!

My Manifesto - Journal Your Christmas 2012

Heres to the holidays
Everything about it...the sights, the smells, the decorations...absolutely EVERY little thing.  
The cursing from my parents about the lights that need to go on the tree.  The lights that worked last year and inexplicably DO NOT work this year.  
The happiness created while decorating the tree...hanging stockings...placing the advent calendar in its place every season...then velcroing all the pieces for the calendar to the felt tree at the top. 
Heres to watching Rudolph every year and passing that tradition down to the next generation...everyone needs to know about bullying based on appearance..RIGHT?!?
Heres to writing a letter the the Jolly man up North.  Hoping for the entire month that he delivers your one true wish...disappointment when you do not in fact receive a pony...unimaginable joy when you do receive Barbie's Palamino horse with a barbie to boot!
Heres to family with all its little quirks and complications.  Who will spend which days with which side of the family...excitement or sadness over which one of these groups include you.  
Heres to coming up with a new tradition for THIS season.  A decision to document my favorite month and preserve it on the internet for all that care to read it.  
Heres to Christmas and all the Joy it provides!

To the moon and back my lovelies!
Sarah

everyone needs a BUMBLE in their life!

Christmas decor is the BEST!

Thanksgiving 2012

Another year...another Thanksgiving.
I started the month with thankfulness post...and much like this blog I was committed to the project for about 6 posts.  I am still thankful for so many things in my life.

~My family - they pull me up out of my funkiest moods...make me laugh on the regular...prove that our silly somewhat twisted sense of humor is genetic.

~My friends - they really are an extension of my family.  I don't make friends easily so when I do...it is for life.  If I need to be silly I have surrounded myself with people who love silliness!  We can stay up into the wee hours of the morning giggling in our pj's.

~My home - My aunt calls it the "Happy House."  I love color and it soothes me to be surrounded by color.  I think I was a tad more subdued with this house.  My brother doesn't call it the clown house, so I have enough color to make me smile...but not so much that it causes spontaneous migraines in others.

~My car - I have wanted a convertible VW Big for as long as I can remember.  I swayed a bit when the convertible Mini Cooper came out...but that did not last long.  My dream came true this year, and when I am able to drive I usually choose to drive with the top down.  Music turned up...top down...singing at the top of my voice!

~My Puppy - I've mentioned this before...but I don't mind repeating myself.  My dog helps me heal daily.  She is far from perfect.  She punishes us if she thinks she is being mistreated (usually a little gift deposited somewhere in the house)...but she also finds me when I am having a come apart and wiggles her way into my lap.  She curls up every night behind my knees to sleep, and she barks ferociously at anyone who knocks on our door.

~My Precious Lovebug - the mere fact that she breathes in and out picks me up.  She pushes me to be better and feel better daily.  On days that I want to spend in bed with the covers pulled up over my head...the thought of missing out on breakfast together pulls me out of bed.  She may have a boyfriend...but she is also willing to let me read all the texts they share.  She pushes me away as she struggles to become her own person...but there are still mornings that she is willing to snuggle with Mom.

That is all for now
To the moon and back,
Sarah

The Bug

Have I said lately that my daughter is a tad sassy.  Today was her school carnival and we had a push pull type argument for how we thought the costume should work.  I of course think everything should be done all out...The Bug is a tad more understated.  She is making use of her costume from last year...a Woodland Princess...and I wanted her to wear the skirt we made last year.  My precious is all about comfort and the skirt was itchy (last year).  My mom spent about an hour trimming out the ribbons that might be scratchy and adding a waistband...but it was still a no go.  So she prepared herself as a Woodland Princess sans skirt.  Looking back (this happened about 30 minutes ago)...it really doesn't matter.  She looked amazing!  I got to do fun sparkly makeup for her and with mascara my child has crazy long eyelashes.  Just saying...because you know she did NOT get those from me.  Here are a couple of pictures to show how the look turned out.  Like I said skirt or no skirt she is a beautiful outgoing girl and she looked excellent!

So today I am thankful for realizing...sometimes the letting another person win an argument isn't all that bad...can be great actually!

To the moon and back my friends!
Sarah

This is my all time favorite picture of her!

here she is much younger as a rainbow fairy!

Posing on the deer stand ladder...what you don't have a deer stand in your backyard? Every junior birdwatcher needs a good spot to perch!

I mean seriously...look at that face!

Dallas Arboretum

I have been MIA for a while and for that I am sorry.  I was on a truly immense chemo schedule that left me either in bed or heaving over the toilet.  Good News/Bad News...it was wrecking my body but doing little to the cancer.  So now I am on a much more doable once every three weeks of Carboplatinum.  Bad News...that is the drug I was on when this journey started, but it had a partner in crime...Taxotere.  I asked Dr. Cloven about going back to the double drug therapy, but she doesn't think my body is up to it after all the other toxins we have put in.

It is so funny we celebrated October family birthdays (we have 3) last night and my cousin was talking about a guy...actually many many people...who choose to be envenomated.  I mean lay down in a hospital bed surrounded by medics and have 2 or 3 venoms injected into their I.V.  It sounded crazy to me until I said outloud..."I don't think I would choose to have toxins shot into my body...wait...nevermind...I have been doing that at least every three weeks for the last 2 years...my bad...it makes complete sense!" I guess the difference is I do it to fend of cancer and possibly death...these "crazy" folks do it for shits and giggles.  There I said it...I found the difference...without a difference my choice to do what I do would be crazy.  Who in their right mind "chooses" to feel like roadkill for the better part of a month...this girl...and I will continue to do it until some vital organ actually gives out...or they find a miracle drug.

On to a cheerier subject.  A couple of weeks ago, my mom and I met my aunt, cousin and her 3 children at the Arboretum.  They have been showcasing some of Dale Chihuly's blown glass for a couple of months and it wraps up at the beginning of November...so we needed to get it seen.  We have another trip planned for tomorrow so The Bug can see it.  The shapes and the colors are amazing...and to mix them with all kinds of flowers and water...it was so healing for me to see.  I think it was good to wait, because we opted out of the heat and into all the great fall decor.  I can't do it justice with words so here are some of my pictures.

Love and light,
Sarah

I thought these looked like brains!

These remind me of marbles...GIANT marbles!

I need this in my backyard!!!!

These remind me of alien hands....with little sucker fingers!

The Dallas Star

Swan Lake

Cinderella's carriage with moss horses!

Joost Ellfers wrote a book Play with Your Food and these pumpkins
could have been in the book! Love their silly faces

GIANT pumpkin...look for tiny Batman.

Number One

That's what number I am!  Make that what number my team is from the NOCC - Break the Silence on Ovarian Cancer Walk.  I am so amazed by the love and support handed out by so many people.  People in my family...friends that I love...friends of my family...friends of my friends.  The school where I worked raised over $1100 on their own.  I am so touched by everyone's involvement.  

Because of the amazing amount of money raised I got an invite to the annual NOCC conference being held in LAS VEGAS in November!!!!!  Wheeeee!   I have never been to Vegas and I have scheduled a chemo holiday for the month of November!  I just wanted to drop in and say thank you to every one that supported a cause close to my heart.  NOCC get money that can press for more research and maybe a less life ruining treatment for this disease.

to the moon and back my AllStars,
Sarah