Number One

That's what number I am!  Make that what number my team is from the NOCC - Break the Silence on Ovarian Cancer Walk.  I am so amazed by the love and support handed out by so many people.  People in my family...friends that I love...friends of my family...friends of my friends.  The school where I worked raised over $1100 on their own.  I am so touched by everyone's involvement.  

Because of the amazing amount of money raised I got an invite to the annual NOCC conference being held in LAS VEGAS in November!!!!!  Wheeeee!   I have never been to Vegas and I have scheduled a chemo holiday for the month of November!  I just wanted to drop in and say thank you to every one that supported a cause close to my heart.  NOCC get money that can press for more research and maybe a less life ruining treatment for this disease.

to the moon and back my AllStars,
Sarah

Back to the blog

I am going to apologize in advance for the surely rambling nature of this blog.  I had chemo today and it always leaves my brain a tad fried.  

This past weekend was the annual NOCC "Race to Break the Silence on Ovarian Cancer."  I have been working for the past 6 months, to build a team, fundraise in all the ways I could figure out from my bed, convince myself that yes I did want to participate in said event, design a t-shirt, become the number one individual fundraiser, become the number one fundraising team "Atnip's AllStars," and then show up for said event.

I am so amazed by the last 3 items on that list.  Last year I spent my time jockeying for 4th and 5th place.  I almost doubled my funds raised last year.  My team grew from 25 people to 35 people, and all those people blanketed me in love and support on the day of the race.  I was unable to participate in the 5K because as I said before I have spent the better part of the last 2 months in bed.  I am pretty worn out, because the current chemo regime leaves my muscles tired along with the rest of me. So I had to get a little creative with my fundraising.

I used to work in an amazing place.  A place that is filled with the most amazing children.  I decided to harness some of that amazingness and give the children an opportunity to help out an amazing cause with a face they can recognize.  I called it "Calling All Coins."  I asked the children to scour their homes for change...sofas, dryers, dad's pockets.  The reward would be given to the homeroom with the heaviest amount of change (I wanted no part in rolling and totalling all that change) would win a pizza party.  I had NO IDEA how into this project the children would get.  As a school they collected over 130 pounds of change and raised over $1100.00.  I still get a lump in my throat.  These are children...choosing to hand over huge jugs of pennies, nickels and dimes they have been saving for who knows how long.  I refuse to believe it was all for a pizza party.  They knew ever class couldn't win, but they continued to donate even after all of the weights had been totaled and a winner had been crowned. Of course they didn't know that because of the enormous amount of generosity shown they would all be given a pizza party...school wide pizza party.   They just kept giving because they are they MOST AMAZING CHILDREN in the world.  

That's all I can type right now.  I promise a longer post about the race later.. I just wanted to devote a post to the amazing students that helped keep me the #1 individual fundraiser for this event!  I might be getting a trip to LasVegas out of it...I think I should have saved some nickels for the nickel slots!

To the moon and back my lovelies!
Sarah 

Thankfulness...Day 122

I had a CT scan yesterday, and I decided it was time for me to try doing some of the routine things on my own.  I went to the office.  I drank my banana flavored barium.  I was called to the back and prepared for the scan.  Everything was exactly the same as every other scan...one change...they took 4 scans...then they asked me to cross my hands over my chest.  It sounds morbid but it felt very dead person in a coffin stance...so I was thoroughly creeped out.  As I lay there arms across my chest...what went through my head was...I need my Mommy.  I thought I could be brave...but I really wish I had asked my Mom to be here.  Well we wrapped up the scan, and I made my way out to the waiting room.  Silver lining of this day...sitting in waiting room was my mother.  She is the most amazing woman.  She listens when the doubts and fears of this disease get to be WAY too much for me to handle.  She is watching her daughter go through some creepy...scary stuff.  She has never missed a chemo...she insists on being the one to sit by my side.  The one to hold my hand then that is what I need.  The one to pull me up off the floor of my bathroom when I feel like everything is too much.  She pushes me...but she listens when I need tenderness and motherly love.  Most importantly she is there when I am scared...even if I have said I don't need her...she is still there waiting for me in the waiting room...waiting to give me a hug and prove that I will never have to do any of this alone.  So today my silver lining is my MOTHER! 
to the moon and back friends,
Sarah
quotes of the day

Thankfulness...Day 104

Today I am thankful for all the fantabulous things I have in my life.  I am so blessed.  I'm glad I started writing this blog...because on days unlike today I can use it to dig into the day and find something that made me smile.  Even on the worst day...where I feel crummy...or guilty...or just plain sad...I can always find something within that day that is worth saying thank you.

Today I don't have to look any farther than my shared DNA.  The only thing missing was my brother and his family.  I got to see my cousins, their husbands and wives and the beautiful children that make their families complete. 

We have all grown up together and into pretty amazing adults if I do say so myself.  In the last two years I have finally found my stride as a mother and it is great to watch my family members who parent so naturally.  So on a day built for thankfulness...I am thankful that I had a chance to check in with family members who are usually scattered across the globe (literally).  I hope everyone else enjoyed a day filled with...

family...

mashed potato cupcake...
frosting, butterscotch and a lemon starburst

Peas and carrots...
green frosting, skittles and orange starburst

food...

and fun.

                

To the moon and back,
Sarah
quotes of the day

Thankfulness...Day 99

I think I might be a few days behind in my thankfulness.  The last couple of days have been sort of rough...achy muscles...flip floppy tummy...etc.  I guess I'll just be thankful and see how many things I can think up!  I am thankful for my family...extended and immediate.  There are so many of them and they all have sweet, crazy...somewhat neurotic personalities (I include myself so no offense intended by calling you neurotic).  The best traits...hands down are loyalty...love...and persistence.  I am so lucky to have this enormous support system.  If I had been fighting this disease on my own...I fully believe I would have lost.  These people hold me up when I can't find a reason to hold myself up.  They listen thoughtfully while I cry...they get mad at me when I look things up on the Internet that only terrify me...they make me laugh when all I want to do is curl up in a ball and sleep until this is all over.  They take me to estate sales...garage sales...holiday bazaars.  They foster my creativity...even when it spills out all over my house.  They make fun of me if I am taking myself to seriously...and allow me to make fun of them without taking it personally.  I guess what I am saying is NA NA NANA NANA my family is better than your family.  I know that probably isn't true, but to me they are the bestest and most wonderful group of people any girl could ever need.  I also know some people do not have the luxury of having a family as close knit as mine.  IF you are one of those people...just ask...I'll totally let you borrow a few family members when I am not feeling as thankful for them as I should.  HEEHEE
to the moon and back
Sarah
quotes of the day.

Thankfulness...Day 89

Today I am thankful for guests in my home.  I don't care if they are announced or unannounced guests...I love when people come and visit.  Today the other teacher's assistant in my classroom came over after work.  She is a breast cancer survivor and she is also very similar to my Mom.  It is great to have her around to pull me up by my bootstraps when I am not quite strong enough to do it on my own.  
Can you guys keep a secret...she is an amazing, sweet, loving lady.  SHHHHHH....don't tell anybody.  She has worked hard to get many in the world to believe that she is a total hard ass...but I know the truth.  She always has a kind word for me at the exact time that I need it.  She says she feels lucky to have me in the classroom with her.  She also says she can't tell when I feel bad after a treatment.  It's nice to hear those things, especially when I feel I don't cover my icky feelings very well.  Plus she has the perfect Mom voice to keep me in line if my biological Mommy happens to be out of town.  
So there you have it...I have new chemo tomorrow...but today I am thankful for a visit from just the right friend.  Thanks
to the moon and back!
Sarah

quote of the day

Thankfulness...Day 85

Today I am thankful for everyone at work.  Sometimes I feel blue...I think that is to be expected with chemo...doctor appointments...crazy hair...yucky stomach...and everything else...but today is not one of those days.  I have a procedure scheduled for tomorrow.  My doctor is going to put some cameras into my abdomen and look around.  She is unnerved by my rising CA-125 and wants to get an idea of what might be going on that wouldn't show up on a CT or PET scan.  Not only will she be looking around with cameras (yes...cameras...plural...3 to be exact)...she will be taking biopsies and doing a wash of my belly (The inside...not the outside).  I have been sort of anxiety ridden for a couple of weeks.  I tried not to think about it, and just push it off to the side...nothing I can do about any of this so why worry...right?!?  I wasn't very successful...I had some really great times with Robin...but my stomach has been gurgly since last week.  Today I worked half a day...and then got to go home and start a colon cleanse (You all wish you were me...right...I know it's hard not to be jealous.)  I am lucky enough to work in a very small school so we are more like family then work people.  I got so many hugs and well wishes today.  I got prayer promises and a surprise Dr. Pepper.  The two ladies who work directly with me in our classroom brought me cards...candy...a Mary Engelbreit calendar...and a rainbow picture frame.  I mean in four hours I got enough warm fuzzies to fill my bucket to the overflow point.  So thanks ladies...I am so lucky to have all of you behind me rooting me on in this battle.  This is just another layover on the way to remission.  I have fully surrendered control to God...He made a plan for me the day was born...I may not always understand it, but it can't be a mistake.  So keep the prayers coming and I will post after all this is over.
to the moon and back!
Sarah


Quote of the day...actually rainbow quotes of the day...just to make me blissfully happy!